Milwaukee Pees In Public

-”Hey Milwaukee, whatcha you doing tonight??”
-”Aw man, gonna get plastered!! Wanna come, Chicago?”
-”Heck yea. Hmm…lets get NYC to be DD.”

The greed driven Forbes magazine recently released a new ranking: America’s Drunkest Cities. They ranked thirty-five large metropolitan areas in the US given available data. Then they used some drunken metrics. And the winner? The honor goes to Milwaukee! I’m hoping the mayor gets a plaque for this title. He/She can hang it on the beer fridge under his/her desk. And nine of the top ten are all northern cold ridden cities. This isn’t surprising as alcohol makes a city buried in snow fun! And as a plus, it also lowers the heating bill!

Some notable mentions:
DC, my current residence, ranked at 20. NYC ranked an unimpressive 32 out of 35. LA’s celebrity infested drunk drivers ranked 23.

Tagged: Drunk, Cities, Drunken Cities